Original Instagram Post – March 03, 2019
For a moment in time, this was our world. Narrow pathways lining an expansive universe of love, laughter, bright futures, and endless possibilities. And though you’d often try to shy away, somehow at the center of it was always you. When I first received the call, it took my best friend nearly ten minutes to even begin to find the words. She didn’t want to be the one to break my heart. Eventually she managed “someone you love committed suicide”. In the two minutes it took her to collect herself, dozens of people flashed through my mind..but not you. Even though adulthood took us in opposite directions, and we hadn’t spoken in years, everyone we had known flashed through my mind, but never you. For a long time I carried her next sentence like an anchor, letting it drag me down into darkness…into some of my deepest sadness. It’s been 13 years, and I can still hear her whisper your name.
I once wrote: “It was a loss that shaped the way I live the rest of my life. I know he is at peace. And for that I am grateful. But selfishly I wish he were still here. His existence made the world a better place.”
I’ve fought hard to ensure it’s your life etched across my heart, not your death. There was too much joy. There was too much laughter. There was too much warmth, and vibrance, and love. So even on the anniversary of the day you left, I can find elation in the fact that you were ever here at all, and gratitude for the path we shared.
“He was the type of person who floods your heart.
And once it starts, it is everlasting.”
#ForeverMissed #ThirteenYears #GoneTooSoon #Suicide #PTSD #Loss #LifeLessons #Love #PheasantRidge #Memories #RealTalk #TheLameChickWrites
