Original livejournal post: 08/03/2005
Music: Rise Against – “Swing Life Away”
Post title: I Tear My Heart Open…Just To Feel
The day had come, when I thought that I finally had found what I had been searching for.
Within hours, the world as I knew it fell apart.
I don’t know why it has taken me this long to realize it.
It’s all connected.
Ghosts of the past will not stay buried.
They will haunt me until I am gone.
I’m not really sure what it all was for.
I’m constantly running in circles.
Still waiting.
I’ve noticed that I’m getting too comfortable at work.
I am far too loved.
Yet not loved enough.
I’m still frozen.
I’m still searching.
I’ve finally figured out why the summer of 2000 is my “Happy Place”.
I now know why it is my retreat.
My inner-sanctum.
It came to me last night in a tearful vision.
Love.
It was the last time I genuinely felt loved.
